A spiritual pagan party on the summer solstice near Stonehenge, was in fact just an orgy for ageing hipsters, it has been reported.
The party, which was organised by 48-year-old accountant Rob Knowles, started off with various ritual dances and chants as the sun went down over Stonehenge.
But within two hours it had descended into a decadent cocktail of heavy alcohol consumption, recreational drug use and casual sex.
Francis Bamford, a 51-year-old data analyst from Slough, explained the appeal of the Pagan party, as she dropped her Ford Fiesta keys in a Wiccan Copper Offering Bowl.
“It’s just so spiritual,” gushed Bamford.
“I really feel in tune with the pagan gods during this magical occasion.”
“The chanting and the folk music takes you to another place,” gushed the ageing office worker.
“God, I hope I pick out Duncan’s keys. He’s dynamite in the sack.”
The next morning, there was a sea of half-naked middle-aged and middle-class hungover partygoers, waiting to be picked up by their deeply embarrassed children.