The Last Jedi director Rian Johnson has been hired to write and direct the new Lord of the Rings series for Amazon Prime and has already revealed his plans to make the original trilogy hero, Frodo Baggins, a filthy sex pest.
The new Lord of the Rings series, which will be based primarily in the Shire and in Bree, two locations made famous by JRR Tolkien’s epic novel and Peter Jackson’s acclaimed film trilogy, will focus on the exploits of a young Frodo to be played by Joseph Gordon-Levitt.
But this will not be the noble and heroic Frodo that fans of the Lord of the Rings are accustomed to.
Instead, the Hobbit will be a drunken letch who spends most of the series attempting to feel up Hobbits, Men, Elves, Orcs and Ents.
Side-plots will feature Pippin and Merry being used as drug mules by heroin kingpin Tom Bombadil and a 65-year-old Aragorn attempting to exploit young women by showing them his broken blade and promising them that they could become royalty, “just like Meghan Markle“.
The controversial surprises from Rian Johnson will not end there.
“People are complaining that I’m going to kill Frodo off in the second season,” explained Johnson.
“They keep telling me that I can’t do it, because it’s a prequel and Frodo needs to be alive for the Lord of the Rings.
“But subverting expectations is what I do. It’s about time Frodo Baggins got the Luke Skywalker treatment.”