The CIA has claimed that Donald Trump is a sleeper agent working for the Russians and that Vladimir Putin is his case officer, in a report published today.
“As President, he is the perfect agent of influence,” said an intelligence spokesman.
“His handler activated him with the secret codeword ‘Mexican Wall’.”
Trump has expressed tremendous respect for US intelligence agencies but said that they were “terrible at the spying game”.
He has also protested that the Russian hacking allegations were part of a political witch-hunt by his political adversaries after they were beaten in the election.
He later went on to blame “gross negligence” by the Democratic National Committee for “allowing” the hacking to take place in.
In a report, the US Department of Homeland Security announced, “Our assessment shows that Russian President Vladimir Putin has decided that the time has come to wake his agent and set him in motion.
“Trump’s favourite film is The Manchurian Candidate. Do we need any more evidence?”