Zlatan Ibrahimović has explained that he doesn’t have a God complex because he is “actually God” after re-signing for Manchester United.
The centre-forward has recovered quickly from a serious knee injury, stating that he gained strength from his worshippers at the Church of Zlatan, which he established earlier this year, who he credited for helping to restore a deity.
Ibrahimović expects to return to Old Trafford next month and has set modest targets of winning the Golden Boot, the Premier League, the Champions League, an Oscar and a Nobel peace prize over the next year.
“The picture of me beating the devil in an arm wrestle was of course a metaphor,” explained Ibrahimović.
“But it also actually happened.”