MOOK NEWS

The FBI has claimed that President John F. Kennedy would have survived his assassination attempt if he had been performing the current dance craze of dabbing.

Ballistics expert Peter Teale stated that the bullet that killed Kennedy would have missed if the incident had taken place anytime from 2013 onwards.

“If the event had taken place today, Mr Kennedy would have almost certainly been ‘dabbing’ to the thronging crowd, thus ducking his head and creating a moving target that would have been near-impossible to hit.”

The revelation is likely to only add to the speculation and conjecture surrounding the 1963 murder.

Many conspiracy theorists are already asking whether the invention of the dance move was delayed by the powers that be in order to ensure the President’s demise.

Online conspiracists are using the hashtag #wtfJFK, as they continue to discuss the repercussions of this latest extraordinary development.

 

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