MOOK NEWS

In a late bid for the female vote, Donald Trump has said that, if elected President, he will send Carrie Mathison from Homeland into Syria.

Hillary’s wars in the Middle East have unleashed destruction, terrorism and ISIS across the world,” said Trump. “We need someone to sort out the mess and Carrie knows how to kick ass.”

In a rare foreign policy speech, Trump continued, “Carrie is an attractive and talented lady. She has spent time in Afghanistan and can apply a woman’s touch when dealing with terrorists.

Former CIA Operations Officer Carrie Mathison was unavailable for comment as she was attending Kabul’s annual cultural music retreat, Jazz For Jihadis.

 

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