Boris Johnson has marked himself ‘safe’ on his Facebook page after Theresa May’s latest Cabinet reshuffle.

Family and friends of the Foreign Secretary had feared for his safety and were said to be relieved to hear that he had survived.

“Many people think that he has been the most incompetent Foreign Secretary in living memory, so naturally we were worried about him,” said a friend of the family.

“The Financial Times reported that Boris Johnson might be the least distinguished figure to occupy the Foreign Office sine 1945,” added another friend who was at Eton with Johnson.

“This is very unfair. He was great on Have I Got News For You and he is terrific company if you want to go for a pint. I am delighted to hear that he is safe.”

Amid controversy over her meetings with Israeli officials, Priti Patel offered her resignation to the Prime Minister, which Theresa May gratefully accepted.

“Priti didn’t lie,” said a colleague of the International Development Secretary.

“She was economical with the truth. Boris does it all the time and somehow gets away with it.”

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